Charmed
by The Glittery Ninja Espada
Summary: Ichigo wants his proposal to Orihime to be memorable, so he decides to go the nontraditional way and not use a ring. But, what else is he to give her? Creativity not being his strong suit, he asks various members of the Soul Society to help him find an alternative to an engagement ring. Urahara has some questionable suggestions, and his dad proves no help at all—what's he to do?


**Although the beginning may suggest otherwise—this is a _dialogue-based story_. Most of the story is strongly implied by the dialogue, which there is a lot of. No excessively deep and beautifully written analysis of feelings here. Sorry, I'm trying something new. :) Warning: the ending is hella anticlimactic.**

* * *

This was it.

Today was the day.

The day that Ichigo Kurosaki was finally going to ask his girlfriend of six years, Orihime Inoue, to marry him.

Scratch that.

Today was the day Ichigo Kurosaki was _supposed_ to ask Orihime Inoue to marry him.

Trouble was, he'd yet to purchase an engagement ring. Or any sort of ring in general.

He'd heard through the grapevine (also known as Tatsuki, Uryū, and Chad)—that Orihime wanted a wedding that was not so much traditional as it was memorable. And memorable it would be—she yearned to wear a fairytale princess-style dress, but always wanted real Martian flowers and robot decorations to adorn her reception tables, and fishcakes and ice cream to be served as the dessert of choice. How _did_ his friends find out these things and yet he remained out of the loop?

Ichigo knew far be it from him to ask her to marry him with anything "traditional" like an engagement ring when her other ideas were so far out.

He was going to make the day he asked her—maybe even begged, if he had to—to marry him more memorable than . . . anything, to be honest.

The problem was, creativity was not really his strong suit, and Ichigo knew it. His art grades were by far the lowest out of any of his classes, and he hated to admit it, but even Rukia's excuses for drawings were probably more well-thought out than his.

So Ichigo did the one thing he vowed never to do regarding his love life.

He asked for help.

* * *

"You wanna ask the Inoue girl to marry you?" Renji asked thoughtfully, scratching his head. "You and her are still dating? I thought she'd dump you after the first month."

Ichigo growled. He should have known the red-haired Soul Reaper would make fun of him. He was just as bad as Shinji.

Rukia elbowed her husband in the stomach. "Be quiet, Renji!" She turned to Ichigo with twinkling eyes. "You're finally asking Orihime to marry you? It's about time!"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ichigo grumbled. He realized he was wasting time—he'd set to meet Orihime after her shift at the local bakery at seven, and it seemed next to impossible to get any information out of these two. "Come on, I need something to make her engagement day special."

Renji raised an eyebrow. "So why are you asking us? In case you haven't noticed, 'Queen of the Chappies' here doesn't really have the greatest sense of aesthetics, and I don't really give a shit, so . . ."

Another elbow flew to Renji's stomach and he coughed, giving his wife a dirty look.

"Chappy is the most beautiful thing in the world!" Rukia argued, crossing her arms and glaring at the redhead.

Ichigo sighed as he rolled his eyes at the bickering couple. Why did he think this was a good idea again?

He took a deep breath and tried to release his frustration. "Okay, what about this," he tried, "what did you guys do in the Soul Society to symbolize your engagement or whatever?"

At that moment, Renji and Rukia stopped arguing and turned towards Ichigo with enormous grins on their faces.

Ichigo gulped. This probably wasn't going to be good.

"We got . . ." Renji began, gripping one sleeve of his shihakushō with his hand.

"Matching . . ." Rukia continued, copying her husband, her grin growing even wider.

After another moment of suspense, they simultaneously yanked back the sleeves of their uniforms, revealing biceps covered in ink, Renji's more so than Rukia's. "Tattoos!" the pair cried, showing off the kanji for their spouse's name etched on each other's arms.

Ichigo blinked. He didn't know that level of badass-ness was possible for an engagement. Why hadn't he thought of that?

Maybe he'd found his perfect engagement "ring" after all.

* * *

"You idiot!" Tatsuki cried, kicking him hard in the shin. Her eyes burned with hellfire. "Do you actually think Orihime would get a tattoo with you?"

Ichigo stiffened and glared at his childhood comrade. "Why the hell not? She's not some weak little flower who's afraid of a little ink!"

"Ichigo Kurosaki," Tatsuki growled, grabbing him by the shirt. "If you even _think_ about getting Orihime a tattoo again, I will kick you in the groin all the way from here to China."

He sighed. Looked like he'd have to find something else.

* * *

"The perfect makeshift engagement ring, you say?" Urahara asked. He smirked deviously. "I may have just the thing."

"Finally!" Ichigo cried, rolling his eyes. "But there better not be any funny business," he warned the shopkeeper.

Urahara smiled innocently and whipped out his fan. "I don't know what you mean, Ichigo, I'm just a humble shop owner—"

"Save it," Ichigo interrupted. "Just show me what you've got."

"No need to be so pushy," the former captain mumbled. He then brightened and began heading to the back of the store. "Ah, well, I suppose the customer's always right."

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "Idiot."

A few moments later, Urahara returned with his smirk in full flight. In his hands, he held a small bag. "Ah, here it is. I've been saving it." He then pulled out the skimpiest pair of female underwear and matching top that Ichigo had ever seen. "What better engagement present than lingerie? It's 20% off, for you especially!"

The Substitute Soul Reaper felt his cheeks turn red and he shut his eyes tightly, putting his head in his hands. "You pervert!"

"I suppose you don't want it, then?" Urahara called out disappointedly as Ichigo's quickly retreating figure disappeared beyond the horizon.

* * *

"I can't believe you, Ichigo!" Kon cried, rolling around the Substitute's bed, his screams sounding as if he was in pain.

Ichigo, who'd just finished repeating the day's happenings, looked at the mod-soul confusedly. "What? You wanted Orihime to get a tattoo?"

Kon glared at him. "Are you an idiot?" he grumbled before his eyes turned into hearts. "I can't believe you missed a chance to see Orihime in lingerie!"

Ichigo felt himself blush again, and he angrily kicked Kon in the head. "Shut the hell up—bastard!"

"Hmph," Kon huffed, rubbing his head in pain. "You don't know how much voluptuous women appreciate a quickie in the bathroom stall."

Another kick was awarded to Kon. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? It's not even relevant!"

"Hey, Ichigo!" a cheery voice called from the hallway as it barged into his room. "What's this I hear about you looking for special engagement ideas for Inoue?"

Ichigo threw a punch at his father, who stood in the doorway. "Get out of here, old man! I wasn't talking to you!"

Isshin toppled to the ground, seemingly unharmed, and rubbed his bruised face thoughtfully. "C'mon, don't you wanna hear how I got Masaki to marry me?"

"No," Ichigo protested stubbornly, but his curious gaze proved otherwise. If there was one thing he enjoyed hearing being talked about, it was his mother.

His father leaned far too close into his personal space and winked. "I promised her a quickie in the bathroom stall."

Yuzu spent the rest of the night nursing Isshin's various bruises and lacerations while Karin watched her father in disgust.

* * *

"Why are you asking me?" Captain Hitsugaya asked irritably. "By your World of the Living standards, I wouldn't even be old enough to get married yet."

"Oh, right," Ichigo muttered. "Sorry, Tōshriō."

"And that's Captain Hitsugaya to you!"

* * *

Byakuya blinked. "Ichigo Kurosaki. You wish to know how the members of the Kuchiki clan propose?"

"Uh, yeah. I guess," Ichigo muttered.

The 6th Division Captain rose and faced him. "To symbolize an engagement, the male must present the female with a silver rose from the carefully-cultivated Kuchiki manor garden."

"Oh . . . kay," Ichigo replied slowly. "So, can I have one? The roses, I mean."

"Are you a member of the Kuchiki clan?"

" . . . No."

"No."

* * *

"I'll tell you only if you let me have the Goddess's hand marriage," Jinta affirmed, crossing his hands over his chest. He grinned hopefully.

Ichigo was not amused. "Who the hell is the 'Goddess'?"

"Y—you know! Your sister! Yuzu!"

"In your dreams, kid. I don't need your help _that_ bad."

* * *

Grimmjow blinked. "How the hell did you get here, Kurosaki?" He growled and conjured a Cero. "You come here to fight?"

The Substitute Soul Reaper ran his hand over his face in exasperation. Why the hell did he think asking _Grimmjow_ for _wedding_ _propsal_ ideas in _Hueco Mundo_ was a good plan?

* * *

"Did Kisuke already suggest the lingerie?" Yoruichi asked, licking her paw calmly.

"Yeah," Ichigo grumbled.

"Then I have no other ideas. Also, on your way out, do you mind pouring me a bowl of milk?"

* * *

"I suggest a new club—with spikes," Ikkaku grinned.

"Maybe a new fancy kimono or something of the sort," Yumichika added.

Ichigo sighed in exasperation. "You want me to propose to her with a kimono? And a club?"

"Yes, is there something wrong with that?"

* * *

"Maybe you could propose to her with a homecooked meal," Yuzu suggested.

"Eh, I don't think a homecooked meal would exactly be _memorable_ , Yuzu," Ichigo stressed.

Karin snorted. "If it's anything like your previous blackened-and-burned meals, it definitely will be."

* * *

"Why would she marry an idiot like you?" Uryū asked, pushing up his glasses. "I highly doubt she'd say 'yes' regardless of what you bring her."

"Why don't you just ask her to marry you without using anything else? Besides your words?" Chad suggested.

Ichigo groaned, proclaiming his eloquence. These two just didn't understand.

* * *

"You finally are asking Orihime to marry you?!" Rangiku shouted. "That is so cute!"

Ichigo huffed. "How in the world is that cute?"

"Of course it's cute," Rangiku argued, squealing. "This is so adorable!" She gasped. "You know what we need to celebrate? Saké!"

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "I haven't even asked her yet. I'm trying to figure out a memorable way to tell her. Stop acting as if we're already married and having a reception or something!"

Rangiku's eyes looked thoughtful for a moment. "This will be good for her."

"Who? Orihime? What are you talking about?" the Substitute asked, raising an eyebrow. "Being proposed to will be good for her?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "Married life will be good for her. She'll finally have a real family."

"You know she could always say 'no' to my proposal," Ichigo pointed out. He then shook his head worriedly. "Let's hope that doesn't happen. If she says 'no', I'll find ways to make myself worthy of her."

Rangiku laughed. "You think she'll say 'no' to you?" She waggled her eyebrows mysteriously and pulled something out of the belt of her shihakushō. "Give this to her," she commanded.

Ichigo cocked his head confusedly at the item. "You want me to give her a teddy bear charm?"

She nodded. "I heard she lost her poor teddy bear Enraku awhile back, and since you're looking for something out of the norm to propose to her with, why not a charm?" She lowered her eyes. "I think her brother gave her the bear, so it must have been special to her."

"Oh—okay."

* * *

"Hi, Ichigo!" Orihime shouted cheerfully, waving as she waited outside the bakery in which she worked at. Ichigo had made it a habit to walk her home after work for the past six years, and today was no exception.

"Orihime," he greeted with a smile, reaching out his hand towards her, which she eagerly accepted. "How was work today?"

She grinned. "It was great! The old man from across the street came in again today! Do you know what he ordered?"

He shook his head. "Not a clue."

"Well," she began. "First he ordered four boxes of donuts with a red bean paste filling, and then six boxes of strawberry scones! I wonder if he's having a party."

"He must've been," he agreed.

They walked in a comfortable silence for a few moments, nothing but the sound of busy cars in the streets and their quiet footsteps echoing against the pavement.

Orihime was the first to speak, cheerful as ever. "How was _your_ day, Ichigo?"

"My day?" He thought for a moment—how busy he had been, running from person to person. It was all for Orihime. And it had been totally worth it. "It was actually pretty great."

She beamed. "I'm so glad to hear that!" Her smile softened. "I'm always happy to hear that you're happy."

Ichigo's heart melted a bit. He knew it was time.

He pulled the bear charm out of his pocket.

And the rest was history.

* * *

 **Ew, the ending sucked, _I know_. Let me know if you found anything confusing.**


End file.
